Why You Hate Networking and How to Change That
6 insights from a Google Exec

Networking is something most of us feel uncomfortable doing. It can feel forced, awkward, or even a little bit fake. But it doesn’t have to be. A lot of people struggle with networking because they see it as something they “have to do” rather than something enjoyable or valuable. But what if you could change how you see networking? What if it could become something positive, not just for your career, but for your personal growth too?
Why Networking Feels Difficult
Networking often feels like a one-way street. The idea of building connections with people purely to benefit from them later can feel sneaky or unnatural. If that’s your perspective, no wonder it feels hard! But networking doesn’t have to be like that. It’s not just about what you can get — it’s about what you can give, too. When you see networking as a way to help others, it suddenly becomes a win-win situation. Both you and your connections can benefit, and that’s what makes it truly valuable.
What Is Your Real Network?
We all have hundreds, maybe thousands, of LinkedIn connections. But are they really part of your network? A real network is about meaningful relationships, not just a long list of contacts.
To get a better sense of your true network, think about how often you interact with people. Those who you talk to regularly — daily, weekly, or even monthly — are more likely to be part of your real network. Over time, if you don’t maintain these interactions, those connections can fade. So, your network is more about quality than quantity.
Why Build a Network?
Networking isn’t just about landing a job or closing a deal. It’s about exposure to new ideas and gaining different perspectives that can help you see the world more clearly. Meeting people from various backgrounds helps you grow and may even make you “luckier” by exposing you to opportunities you wouldn’t have encountered otherwise.
It’s also important to contribute to your network. Sharing your unique experiences or expertise can help others in ways you might not even realize, creating a ripple effect that benefits everyone.
Key Insights for Better Networking
Here are some key takeaways from successful networkers:
- It’s About Access, Not Numbers:
Having a small, well-connected network can sometimes be more valuable than having hundreds of contacts. It’s not the size that matters but who you have access to. A few influential connections can open many doors. - Be Intentional:
Networking doesn’t happen by accident. It requires effort. If you’re looking for a mentor or a potential investor, you need to show up where those people are — company retreats, startup events, or industry meetups. - Learn to “Cold Call”:
Don’t be afraid to reach out to people you don’t know. Introduce yourself and ask for a few minutes of their time. One great piece of advice is to try to connect with someone who could truly change your career. You may not always get a response, but all it takes is one “yes” to make a big impact. - Give Before You Ask:
When you first meet someone, don’t immediately ask for a favor. Instead, offer something of value, whether it’s advice, a resource, or simply your time. Building trust takes time, and the best relationships are those where both parties give before asking. - Increase Your Value:
The more valuable you are in your field, the less effort it takes to maintain your network. If you’re an expert in your area, people will naturally seek you out. Show your skills, share your work, and let people come to you. - Maintain Your Network:
Building a network is one thing; maintaining it is another. If you don’t stay in touch with your connections, your network will shrink over time. The right size for your network depends on how much time and energy you’re willing to invest. You are the limiting factor, so figure out how many people you can realistically engage with regularly.
Conclusion
Networking doesn’t have to feel awkward or transactional. If you focus on building meaningful relationships and offering value, it becomes something much more rewarding. In the end, networking is about mutual growth — uplifting others while advancing yourself.
If this post resonated with you, feel free to share it with your network!